Children need to feel challenged in order to grow. In fact, researchers have found that when children don’t feel challenged in a certain activity, they’ll often change the activity to make it challenging.¹Â Young students have a natural desire to learn and to develop new skills; they want to engage in activities that allow them to improve and to excel. While it’s important to keep children safe as they experiment and try out new things, parents and teachers need to be careful not to interfere with important steps in a child’s learning process, even if those steps are difficult, frustrating, or even emotionally painful for the child.

In her blog, “Why It’s Important to Let Your Child Make Mistakes,” research psychologist Dr. Peggy Drexler explains the difference between keeping a child safe and protecting her from necessary failures:

“…[O]ur responsibility is to keep kids unharmed. That doesn’t mean shielding them from all possibility of defeat. It means letting them fail safely.”

She gives a few tips to help parents to accomplish this fine balance (these same tips can also be applied to a classroom setting):

• “Aim to be reliable, but non-interfering.”
• “Involve [the child] in the decision making.”
• “Let [the child] solve her own problems.”

When given the freedom to choose their own paths and the risks they want to take, children will naturally take bold steps forward. It’s important for adults not to dampen that boldness, or else their children might not be fully prepared to be successful, autonomous adults when they’re older.

In a similar blog by Time writer Paul Tough, “Back to School: Why Grit Is More Important Than Good Grades,” Tough makes the argument that school is the perfect environment for learning because students can fail safely. Thinking about grades only, this might not be readily apparent, but there are other educational benefits to consider. Tough explains: “…[W]hat we don’t think about enough is how to help our children build their character — how to help them develop skills like perseverance, grit, optimism, conscientiousness, and self-control, which together arguably do more to determine success than S.A.T. scores or I.Q.”

This idea, that success is more firmly rooted in strength of character than academic achievement, is supported by research. Tough cites a recent study that “found that adults who had experienced little or no adversity growing up were actually less happy and confident than those who had experienced a few significant setbacks in childhood.” If parents (or teachers) try to minimize the amount of difficulty that kids experience in school, however, whether that’s by helping too much with homework or encouraging kids to focus only on subjects they’re good at, these same children will grow up more disadvantaged than if they had only had a mediocre SAT score.

As reported in the Edutopia blog “Experienced Teachers Reflect on Their First Year,” one teacher, when asked what she’d learned that was most important since her first year of teaching, explained her philosophy for challenging children: “Create a learning environment in which students feel comfortable, and they’ll take the risks of making mistakes.” Since kids will seek out challenges of their own accord, it’s important that teachers and parents create an environment, both in the classroom and at home, that will help kids feel comfortable enough to take risks and make mistakes without fear of shame or rejection. This environment needs to be both physically and emotionally safe, free of both safety hazards and put-downs. Once that’s accomplished, and the students feel secure enough to move around and explore, the possibilities are endless.

LifeBound is dedicated to helping students embrace the best that is within themselves through learning what they have to offer the world, to taking the risks to go after what they dream for, to following through with people and actions which can make those dreams a reality. Coaching is one of the tools that can help students learn to understand themselves, solve problems, evaluate options, and move through challenge and difficulty with grace and ease. We conduct coaching training for students and educators who work with students. To learn more, visit www.lifeboundcoaching.com.

____________________________________________________________________________

¹Mandigo, James L., and Nicholas L. Holt. “Elementary Students’ Accounts of Optimal Challenge in Physical Education.” Physical Educator 63.4 (Early Winter 2006): 170-183. Academic Search Complete. Web. 6 June 2012.

Graduates in 2012 will be entering an economy with more debt and less job opportunities than they would have 20 or even 10 years ago.  The last recession of this proportion was actually in 1984, the year I graduated from college.

But the surprise isn’t only on the new graduates. Employers are gaining new hires who have spent some of their most formidable years in a bad economy and who have responded with either apathy or a zeal to overcome obstacles in the professional world. For both kinds of young adults, and those in between, they will be up against some challenges that, although sometimes grim, are the reality of our current economy. Instead of  being the apathetic new hire or job seeker, I encourage you to take on the following challenges with the mindset that you will keep moving forward until you can overcome.

Challenge: There aren’t enough jobs to employ teens and new grads.

There are 75 million people ages 15 to 24 who are currently looking for work around the world. You are not alone in your struggle, and that may require you to be more creative and open when looking for a job. Some new graduates are moving to Asian nations in an effort to get their career started, according to the article “‘Made’ in China: The Millenials Look East for Jobs.”¹Â As population growth in China slows and the number of elderly people increases, more European and American citizens are moving East and taking advantage of the softening migration rules.

Many new graduates are also choosing to create jobs of their own². With the boom in startups and a national call for more innovation, new graduates with an entrepreneurial spirit are encouraged to go back to small business models and use their digital expertise to find their place in the new economy.

Challenge: Many teens and young adults don’t have the skills to land and keep a job. 

More than half of American teens are unemployed, which brings many more long-term concerns than it does for concerns over teen wallets. The scarcity of teen jobs implies that a large portion of teens will go through their high school and college years without having any real-world experience that is critical for learning how to navigate the world of work after college. Young adults will have to have experiential learning opportunities to learn these skills, and many are forced to push this basic learning until after college.

In her article “Too Busy for a Summer Job? Why America’s Youth Lacks Basic Work Skills,” Erika Christakis points out a paradox that today’s young adults are living: “Despite unprecedented technological and cultural sophistication, this generation’s 20-year-olds lack some of the ‘soft’ skills that are necessary to move up the professional ladder: perseverance, humility, flexibility and commitment.”^3 Be willing to take on experiences that could propose a learning opportunity, even if they aren’t ideal. Any job is better than no job when it comes developing transferable skills you need to land a more ideal and better paying job in the future.

Challenge: Many new grads enter the working world are buried in debt. 

Recently, the U.S. student-loan debt reached $1 trillion, surpassing credit card debt.^4 Many students went into their college careers willingly taking on decades worth of debt, believing there would be a job waiting for them after graduation. For many, the jobs aren’t there and for many there are jobs, but not ones that pay a high enough salary to put a dent in their monthly loan payments.

As a result of high student loan debt, a report by Pew Research Center suggests more young adults are postponing marriage, having children, and buying assets, like cars and homes.^5 Is it going to take longer to get to your career goals than you had planned freshman year? Reassess your career path and take it one step at a time.

Employment opportunities are scarce, but available; learning opportunities are abundant, but need to be taken advantage of; and debt cripples many dreams of buying homes, starting families, or pursuing higher education, but there is still hope. There may be challenges ahead, but with preparation, they can be less of a surprise.

To frame this situation in context, the brave men and women who survived World War II came back to the United States with pennies to their name.  They built much of our modern economy by starting in the mailroom, cleaning toilets, and working at more than one job.  What these industrious people learned is, in the words of James Allen:  The situation doesn’t make the man, it reveals him to himself.  In other words, difficult times show us who we are.  No matter who you are, no matter what your situation, this is your opportunity to shine. Adelante!

_________________________________________________________________________________

Sources:

¹“‘Made’ in China: The Millenials Look East for Jobs,” by Courtney Subramanian. 30 April 2012. Time. Accessed on 1 May 2012. http://globalspin.blogs.time.com/2012/04/30/made-in-china-the-millennials-look-east-for-jobs/

²“Why New Graduates Should Consider Entrepreneurship,” by Alexis Grant. 12 May 2012. US News. http://money.usnews.com/money/careers/articles/2011/07/12/why-new-graduates-should-consider-entrepreneurship

³“Too Busy for a Summer Job? Why America’s Youth Lacks Basic Work Skills,” by Erika Christakis. 1 May 2012. Time. Accessed on 1 May 2012. http://ideas.time.com/2012/05/01/too-busy-for-a-summer-job-why-americas-youth-lacks-basic-worth-skills/

⁴“Student-Loan Debt Reaches Record $1 Trillion, Report Says,” 22 March 2012. Bloomberg. Accessed on 1 May 2012. http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-03-22/student-loan-debt-reaches-record-1-trillion-u-s-report-says.html

⁵“US Jobs Gap Between Young and Old Is Widest Ever,” by Hope Yen 9 February 2012. The Oakland Press. Accessed on 1 May 2012. http://www.theoaklandpress.com/articles/2012/02/09/news/doc4f33c9b707386347710719.txt

The next wave of college graduates will be stepping into the world of work over the coming weeks. Some already have jobs, some are job hunting, and some have pushed aside the thought of a career until after finals week. No matter where you stand on the job front, you can all benefit by updating your vocabulary with a few words that can help you push through difficult times on the job hunt, on the job, or in all aspects of life. These words to live by are:

Grit. Persistence. Challenge.

As you transition and settle into new job territory, remember to revisit these words during the many transitions that are ahead. Just like in your college years, you will be confronted with the unexpected, work long hours, get stressed out, and sometimes be tempted to take the easy way out. But as many of you discovered in your college years, persistence will be invaluable as you learn, grow, and find yourself by standing strong to embrace  challenge. As you approach the working world remember the words grit, persistence, and challenge as you come across some of the common career challenges and milestones, especially on days that test your patience, sanity, and chosen career course.

• Stay at your entry-level job for at least two years. Why do you think it might be important to stay for more than a few months or a year at your job? While you build  relationships with people who could be a future reference and create a solid job description to put on your resume, the most important thing you do is build real-world experiences and learn real-world skills which become the foundation for everything else you do. It is hard to learn anything inside of two years.  But for quick  starts who are well beyond the learning curve, the second year can be the time when real skill and contributions are made laying the groundwork for more responsibility and sometimes inventing a whole new job function. Before quitting your job prematurely, or checking out and coasting on autopilot, ask yourself  how you will benefit by seeing your job as a challenge to be mastered, mentally jumping over all of the obstacles on the way.
• Set yourself apart. Once in your job, show your uniqueness, your extraordinary work ethic, and your desire to learn. Whether it’s staying late, taking on a heavier work load, or bringing more ideas to the team, you need to tap into that “extra” energy that sets you apart. You need to use your grit, persistence, and desire for challenge to make a difference in your work environment, on your team or with your ideas. Figure out how your unique abilities can improve your company and bring forth measurable results.
• Keep learning. The end of a college career doesn’t mean the end of your learning career; in fact, it is just the beginning. You’ve spent eighteen plus years learning how to seek knowledge, and now it is time to be a self-motivated learner. Technology will continue to change many of our industries, and as you become a seasoned worker, it’s important you are open to change and willing to learn new ways of doing things. Continue being a valued team member by blending your years of experience with a desire to keep learning and stay up-to-date. When you bring these new insights to your work world, you improve the overall mission and scope of your team, department, or company.

Many of today’s students are familiar with the option of “extra credit” on an assignment.  Many high school classes give this as an option. Yesterday, I spoke with a professor who works with freshmen at a major state university. He doesn’t believe in “extra credit” because he feels that students should want to do a quality job because it’s important not because they get extra brownie points.   There may be a place and time for extra credit at the college level, but with some caveats.

Many college professors and employers share this professor’s sentiments. When it comes to students or employees going beyond the task at hand in the adult world, it’s a given for competence. Extra credit doesn’t exist. Doing your “extra credit” at work or in college — or having a 110% work ethic — is what’s expected of a stellar student or worker. Your reward for doing extra credit in the real world? Employment. As you show your employer you are an indispensable player on the team, you might get a raise, promotion, or a good letter of recommendation, but these career milestones aren’t points for putting in extra work; they are the reality.

For young children and teens, bribery or compensation might be one way to approach chores, eat the vegetables, or do homework, but as they age, students need to drop the idea that doing an exceptional job or more than is asked of them is anything but the norm. How can K-12 educators and college professors help students realize going beyond — or simply doing your job — in the real world doesn’t always come with an extra reward?  How can we encourage young adults to learn to love the challenge and the reward that doing your best provides?  How can we move from a perspective of constant extrinsic encouragement—a trophy for every child no matter what they accomplish on the playing field—to a more lasting and deeper intrinsic motivation from accomplishing real work through pitfalls, difficulties, and obstacles?

When students and employees put in the work, grow, and contribute, they will get noticed. However, no one will be there to ask them to do the extra work. How can you encourage your students to embrace challenge to get ready for college and the working world? How can your classroom reflect more of these workplace norms that successful grads will encounter  in the real world?   Ask students: who would you rather hire—the person who needs extra credit or the self-starter who enjoys over delivering?  In countries like China, India, Germany, Sweeden, Finland, and Singapore students have the inner drive to succeed.  Will your students be ready to work side by side and stand toe to toe with these students in the global world of work?

Many parents and educators equate a student’s high self-esteem with high achievement. However, according in the article “In schools, self-esteem boosting is losing favor to rigor, finer-tuned praise,” empty praise is out, and a new vocabulary that supports challenge is in. So, how can we work with students to hold them accountable to high expectations while helping them to believe in themselves to risk, to try, to grow, and to deliver quality work?

Research shows “unearned praise does not help students but instead interferes with significant learning opportunities.” Students learn to accept challenge and move beyond difficult obstacles when they are encouraged by educators with words like “persistence,” “risk-taking,” and “resilience.” Studies also show that praising effort over intelligence is another way students can learn to enjoy challenge. An academic coaching question you might ask a student is:  on a scale of 1-10 (1=lowest) how much effort did you exert on this assignment, preparing for this test or participating in this class?  If the answer is under 5, the student may be developing more slacker tendencies which will impede their progress over time.

Rocky Hill Middle School started the school year by teaching their 1,100 students about brain development. Teaching students about how the brain makes connections and continues to grow can give some students a sense of control over their learning. Students should be encouraged to look inward to cultivate their own judgment and motivation to learn, rather than rely on outside feedback, according to Alfie Kohn, author of “Punished by Rewards.”

How can you help students look inside when confronted with a challenge, instead of waiting for outside encouragement?

How can you adjust your vocabulary to support a student’s effort instead of intelligence?

How would your classroom dynamic change if students had to find their own answers? Are you, as a parent, teacher or counselor ready to release the reigns of control somewhat so that you can become the academic coach and champion of your child’s best effort?

____________________________________________________________________________________________

Source:

“In schools, self-esteem boosting is losing favor to rigor, finer-tuned praise,” by Michael Alison Chandler. 15 January 2012. The Washington Post. Accessed on 17 January 2012. http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/education/in-schools-self-esteem-boosting-is-losing-favor-to-rigor-finer-tuned-praise/2012/01/11/gIQAXFnF1P_story.html